The Gareth Cliff Show

He lived & he is dead

18.08.20 Pt 1 - Fellow South Africans, not to worry, NDZ didn't do anything. She was a victim of 'the machine', plus she was married to Jacob - so there's that. Should you be shallow or do people's personalities mean anything in the year of our lord, Instagram 2020. If…

18 Aug 2020 12AM 52 min

Be Tender on Tinder

17.08.20 Pt 2 - William and his wife might run out of money soon, how will a poor Prince live? Are pandemics a hotspot for Tinder trolls? Education pays, they say, NSFAS in particular. If you are going to travel, don't take a boat to Greece, they're not taking visitors…

17 Aug 2020 1AM 52 min

Graceful nipples

17.08.20 Pt 1 - Should we ban the booze benders in South Africa? What do you do if your neighbour's nipples are on display for all to see, like Grace Kelly in Rear Window? Politicians wouldn't dick around if they had less room for corruption. Lockdown friends are best if…

17 Aug 2020 12AM 58 min

Dlamini the Drunkard Downer

14.08.20 Pt 2 - Level 2 is on the way, but it comes with a few creases. If we're going to be out in public, maybe dancing girls in nightclubs have the solution. Is there anything as cold as a whore's heart? Only methheads don't answer calls... put the pipe…

14 Aug 2020 1AM 59 min

The People's Mug

14.08.20 Pt 1 - Charles was once married to a princess who was liked by people, that was no good... you can get a mug with them on there though. Should people augment their looks, or should they age naturally? There's a new chief of YouTube, he sings badly, but…

14 Aug 2020 12AM 56 min

Data in my back door

13.08.20 Pt 2 - Brexit has a cousin and this cousin comes with good weather, wine and a mountain. If you have an iPhone you can now determine where your data goes, including which tech giants can crawl up your rear orifice to exploit you. The big money backs the…

13 Aug 2020 1AM 59 min

Are Ellen's chakras cancelled too?

13.08.20 Pt 1 - The prayer of the devil exists only in the man who runs when he's not being chased. Are chakras real, because maybe the seasons affect how you should live your life? Is South Africa against being protected by its protector? Does the President wear slippers while…

13 Aug 2020 12AM 49 min

Cofat-19... no bath is wide enough

12.08.20 Pt 2 - The real pandemic is Cofat-19, waist expansion - coming to beaches near you soon. Kamala Harris is the running mate nomination for Joe Biden and is in the hot seat right away. Shock horror... some people are actually just nice people. The US Presidential race might…

12 Aug 2020 1AM 55 min

Squish for the Covid

12.08.20 Pt 1 - Do you bath or shower in the mornings, and what does that say about you? Is it a nightmare to turn on a manual geyser? Corruption is alright, until you're gatvol. Is patriotism useful? If you want the Covid cure to work, squish the lemon, don't…

12 Aug 2020 12AM 55 min

The Secret Social Lube

11.08.20 Pt 2 - If you keep secrets, does it matter to you who gets hurt? Is there such a thing as the 'bro code'? Julius Malema seems to think Vaseline is important for the relationship citizens share with the ruling party. Calling some people ''emotionally wonky" is tough, but…

11 Aug 2020 1AM 55 min

The Old & The Restless

11.08.20 Pt 1 - The old and the restless met up for a secret party this past weekend, just be careful of those thirsty gold diggers... they'll bring down an empire. If you are in a relationship, do you need two cellphones to prevent being caught? The Nkandla tuckshop is…

11 Aug 2020 12AM 53 min

Lizard Brains like Poker

07.08.20 Pt 2 - The good news is that science exists. Our lizard brains lead us to be excited by certain headlines, why is this? Sorry to hear that you need to be spoon fed, but some people like to think. The king of hedonism is in hot water... insane…

7 Aug 2020 1AM 54 min

Forget Wife Swap, try Baby Swap

07.08.20 Pt 1 - Siya might be a sign language saint and not know it. Medals are of no use after the first one. Ellen is starting to realise that her mansion might actually become a prison... new show idea: 'De Rossi & DeGeneres: Dancing Degenerates'. There are glitches in…

7 Aug 2020 12AM 47 min

Free markets can't be shackled

06.08.20 Pt 2 - Is the state of life on the street vs the flourishing of big business troubling for social cohesion? The notion that people in the townships don't pay for electricity might need a review. Should an interviewer be allowed to get emotional in an interview, or is…

6 Aug 2020 1AM 56 min

Do Zombies like Hippie Crack?

06.08.20 Pt 1 - Imagine the horror of being told you actually have to go to the office. Some of us are lockdown babies now. The airport seems like a place only fit for zombies at the moment. It might be 'lights out' for those who have stolen from Eskom…

6 Aug 2020 12AM 56 min

Shake & Bake

05.08.20 Pt 2 - If you are going to bake on YouTube, it's probably worth telling people that you have a long member in your brooks. If you are 'the funny friend', please just be funny... no need to be smart, you clown. There's a big reveal on the show…

5 Aug 2020 1AM 54 min

Asbestos is worst-os

05.08.20 Pt 1 - Is it worth staying up to watch rockets with big bums? If you eat the correct fungus, you are in for the trip of a lifetime. Lego has become an engineer's task - stay humble people. Should there be an age limit for old drivers? Turns…

5 Aug 2020 12AM 53 min

Oh no, Ellen must go

04.08.20 Pt 2 - The paradigm of your romantic relationships is shifting without you knowing, some may even say it's changing without your consent. If you go to Japan, be aware that the word “no” has more than one meaning, especially in the bedroom. If you like just doing the…

4 Aug 2020 1AM 48 min

Keys, cars & crystals

04.08.20 Pt 1 - If you cheat on your wife, the secret is not to give her reasons to key your car, it's a bad look for all of you. Also, don't cheat on your wife and have her arrested. Is Covid over in South Africa? Are we to take…

4 Aug 2020 12AM 57 min

Earn the damn invite!

03.08.20 Pt 2 - Getting invited to a wedding shouldn't be a given, just because you're a relative... what's a great way to make people earn the invite? Dreams shouldn't be a place for radio presenters, it's for ancestors. Is Mabuza dead or alive? It's not clear what stinks more,…

3 Aug 2020 1AM 52 min