That 80s Show
Shoulder pads, Rubik’s cubes, luminous clothes, angsty movies... and of course loads of factoids. Paulo and Dori are living in the past - and loving it!
Kudu be love | George Michael's back alley | Cullen your bluff
They say you can carbon-date someone by the Tim Curry role they instantly recognise. Paulo would happily follow Tim down any drainpipe in the world, but Dori's favourite Tim Curry role might surprise you. Actually, it won't. It's exactly what you think it is... and it's astounding. That does, however,…
Dolly Parton en Die Man van Staal | FeldFest| The Hoff's cod piece blew the budget
Paulo is back from Portugal with a tan to rival Ridgeley's! We pay tribute to Dolly Parton and her 80s movie career, where she co-starred with Sly, Burt en Die Man van Staal — but which part was staal? Corey Feldman's birthday party was a blast... for Corey, while everyone…
Rummaging through a Corey Hole | Reading Dolph Lundgren like a porny person | Jumping on the Volkswagen
It's Corey Feldman's birthday week, and everyone is invited!!!! As long as you pay the cover charge. While rummaging through a Corey Hole, we discover his Spotify page, his carefully moderated comment section, his tasteful LA villa, his energy drink brand, and the thing we're all here for. Whatever it…
Trump vs Milli Vanilli | Orko taunts kids of divorce | Upgrading your cherry
Milli Vanilli, Young MC and C+C Music Factory - ultimate 80s party playlist - or the latest artists to feud with Donald Trump? Someone needs to stop. Collaborate. And listen. Divorce became a really hot topic in the 80s, and who better to navigate kids through it than one of…
Michael Jacksons adopted nose | Exploding knob status | Dori wants Dolly coffee
Corey Feldman falls ill on a flight and makes the news — conveniently just a week before releasing new music for the first time in years. He has our attention. We imagine John Stamos with Michael Jackson's nose, and Paulo finds a movie that just may send him to hell…
Jason Donovan and amazing spray on pants | Johnny 5 says you’ll survive | Fisher Price Adult Toys
Dori tried to watch the Kylie documentary on Netflix but gave up the moment she saw Jason Donovan and his amazing, not technicolour — spray-on leather pants. Danny Pintauro, AKA Jonathan from Who's the Boss?, has a new project with Amazon, and Balki turns into a d*ck when he puts…
A Specifically 80s Heist | Corey Feldman Told to Beat It | Don’t Use James Brown’s Toilet
The ultimate 80s weekend outing was pointless if it didn’t include a stop at Santarama Miniland. But Jan van Riebeeck’s Lilliputian empire has crumbled — and it’s given Paulo an idea for a very specific, very tiny heist. Naturally, it somehow involves Michael Jackson. And because we said “Michael Jackson”…
Big Hair , Nothing Down There | Readers Digest Charity Calendars | Jean Claude's espadrilles
What’s up, docs? Culture Club, Knight Rider and Kylie Minogue all get their own documentaries — will we find out if Michael Knight had a bonnet as smooth as K.I.T.T.'s? And what does it have to do with Optimus Prime reading a cake recipe? In the 80s, we’d watch almost…
The Little Nipple Club | Willie Nelson and The Little Red Hen | But face it, she’s Madonna
The Michael Jackson biopic has hit the big screen — Dori wants scandal, Paulo just wants to know who plays Bubbles. One thing we must know by now is that when you say Michael Jackson’s name three times in a row, you’ll summon impersonator extraordinaire Corey Feldman — with his…
Lamas, Lamas and more Lamas | R.I.P M.J.F?
More llamas per minute than a Falcon Crest binge-watch, Paulo’s latest obsession covers semi-nude photo shoots, Urban Dictionary definitions, and a movie about breakdancing, graffiti, and rapping — in which Lorenzo does none of the three. But before we get to #LamLear, Paulo found Hell — and it’s in the…
Rock and Roll Hall of Wham! | Save the drama for your Lamas | Saggy balls and Perimenopause
Paulo takes Dori on a tour of fictional ’80s hospitals, where the nurses were snarky and the doctors were Doogie. We take a look at Phil Collins now as he spends another day in paradise called the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. We have a new favourite ’80s power…
Death's Near-Chuck Norris Experience
We’re breaking format like Chuck Norris broke teeth, as we take a moment to remember the man who had his own line of “Action Jeans.” The perfect jeans for karate kick slap action. With 13 movies in the 80s alone and a projected on-screen body count of over 400, Chuck…
Living next door to Tony | Scope Magazines on Marketplace | Vermy The Dragon
LEVEL ORANGE ALERT – Noël Opperman has crossed the Pretoria border and is soiling our new couch. He’s here to tell us about the latest edition of The Retro Fair and how he wanted to be Madonna’s boy toy. Paulo is apparently in a sitcom with Tony Danza, while Dori…
Living next door to Tony | Scope Magazines on Marketplace | Vermy The Dragon
LEVEL ORANGE ALERT – Noël Opperman has crossed the Pretoria border and is soiling our new couch. He’s here to tell us about the latest edition of The Retro Fair and how he wanted to be Madonna’s boy toy. Paulo is apparently in a sitcom with Tony Danza, while Dori…
Don’t waste the Swayze | Will Corey Feldman give us hives? | Enid Blyton Nightmares
Dori is back from her 80s cruise and we find out how she didn’t waste a single sway(ze), met the Mattress Brothers, and hear about the scariest thing in her cabin. Corey Feldman is a free man, but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t give you hives. And while we find…
Twice as Nice Vanilla Ice | CDogg for hire | Whose the Boss, Now?
Vanilla Ice is back in the charts and he just wants to dance — and for a podcast that can’t play music, there sure is a lot of singing. We discover the original He-Man theme song, and somehow it leads us directly to Michael Jackson and E.T. How much is…
Sea Dogs & CDogg | Kak Papier Poppie | A MacGuyver Haircut
How did a German Italo-disco song by two men named Hayo get Paulo banned from the internet? Spoiler… it involves the numbers 6 and 9. Dori is going on a cruise, but she’s not allowed to take her own music unless it’s something by Bo(u)y George. We take time to…
Dori’s Day Off | NeverEnding Falkor Wors | All aboard for a mixtape
Dubai chocolates are just Peppermint Crisps that went to private school - thank God we never fell for trends in the 80s. What was going on with Mastermind? Dori tells us how she made it a game for one whereas some of the covers suggested it was a game more…
Dori Drinks Brown Liquid After Midnight | A Porn Star In A Deep Freeze | His Dukiness and a Gummi-cide
Caffeine is Dori’s mortal enemy, while Paulo regrets eating quite that many I&J Steakhouse Melts. Can you say “In the centre, Mr Cholesterol”? Sure, Alex Honnold did a bit of a climb, but he’s no match for the barrel-obsessed daredevils of the 80s. Michael J. Fox is back on our…
I.Have. The Trailer | Snap, Crackle and Coco Pops | Julio Iglesias and the Bermuda Triangle
WE. HAVE. THE POWER!!! We knew it wouldn’t be long before another 80s pop-culture phenomenon filled the Stranger Things-shaped hole in our content. Paulo wasted far too much time watching MOTU… and he’s not done yet. The saga of Freddie Mercury’s secret daughter takes a macabre turn, while Julio Iglesias…