Are We All Playing by the Same Rules?

Loading player...
Content warning: This episode is for adults (18+) only.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the chaos that is dating — the frustrations, the patterns, the disappointments, the occasional glimmers of hope — and how many of us, especially in the straight dating world, seem to be stuck in this endless loop of confusion.

So it got me wondering:

Are these struggles — the ghosting, the miscommunication, the emotional unavailability — just part of the straight dating experience?

Or is this something that crosses the board, no matter who you love or how you identify?

Is it possible that dating is actually easier — or at least different — in the queer community?

Or is it just a whole different set of challenges?

I didn’t want to make assumptions. So, I did what any curious, slightly frustrated person would do:
I called up a few of my queer friends — people I trust, who live and love honestly — and I asked them some questions. I have MANY questions.

Let’s get into it.
2 Jul English Explicit South Africa Relationships · Comedy

Other recent episodes

What is our Problem? (with Danny Painter)

*Content warning* In this episode, we cover topics including sex, mental health, grief, cannibalism, and a whole lot more. So if you're listening around little ears—or you’re not in the mood for some very real, very raw conversation—maybe hit pause and come back when the time’s right. This episode is…
25 Jun 46 min

What Makes a Strong Marriage? (with Gerda de Sousa)

You know, I’m always talking about dating and how messy it is, and love — and how messy that is too. But really, there’s also a silver lining. And that, of course, is marriage. Someone I really look up to — who’s done really well at this marriage thing —…
19 Jun 48 min

What Do My Daughters Think?

This week, I thought to myself—there are a few people who really know me. And then there are two young women who know me the wellest (yes, I know that’s not a word… but we’re going with it). I’m talking about my daughters, Simone and Zhara, 22 and 20. Becoming…
11 Jun 29 min

How Do Some People Have the Audacity?

This week’s episode is all about audacity. The audacity to speak your truth. The audacity to go after what your heart really wants—even if it’s messy, complicated, or unexpected. Joining me is Shantelle Engelbrecht, who does exactly that. She’s the force behind Coloured Girls Rock, an incredible Facebook community that’s…
4 Jun 32 min

Do South Africans Date Differently?

When we think about dating apps or matchmaking services, our minds usually go to the big international names. But what about platforms built specifically for us? For South Africans? This week, we’re looking a little closer to home. In this episode of Love, Dating and Chaos, I put on my…
29 May 46 min